BALANCE isn't a LIE!!!!!
On today's podcast I'm going to give you 5 ways to create YOUR own definition of balance and craft a life that is BY DESIGN.
How many times have you heard... (or even said...)
"I don't believe in balance"
Tough love time.
Not believing in balance is a lie that people tell themselves so they can make excuses for why they are lacking in one area or another.
You have the power to define your life. YOU.
You GET to:
Wake up each morning with a clean page in your planner
Chose what to fill open space with
Pick how you spend discretionary income
Decide what you really want
Work towards the life of your dreams
Set boundaries that matter to you
Chose who your 5 closest friends are
Look, life is messy. We have kids, spouses, jobs, bills... but we also can live proactively instead of reactively.
Do you want to define what balance means for you and live a life by design?
Step 1: Inventory your life.
Imagine you were doing a food diary... same concept. Instead we are making a list of how are you spending your time. Make a list of everything you do within your waking hours for at least 48 hours. Be HONEST.
Step 2: Star the A-activies, the non-negotionables, and the important stuff.
I.E. focused time working, a job, playing with your kids, cooking dinner, meditation, prayer time, a workout... the GOLD.
Step 3: Highlight the crap. This is the time you can fill with something you are LACKING.
I.E. scrolling social media, watching mindless TV, picking your teeth, talking drama on the phone with your bestie, wasting time doing______.
Step 4: DECIDE to claim balance.
Define your 3 - 4 categories.
For me it is Faith, Family, Health, and Business. In that order.
Step 5: PLAN balance into your week.
Example: Every morning I plan 30 minutes of spirituality. Prayer, my devotional, my journaling. Most weekends I social media detox and pour into my family. I usually don't work and sometimes I even delete the apps! Monday - Thursday I WORK. I focus on my biz for at least 4-5 hours a day. DEDICATED time. No phone calls, no distractions, no multi-tasking... Last, I meal prep on Sundays and workout 5 times a week.
This is what balance means to me. And my best, BALANCED life is non-negotiable. Period.
In today's episode, I'm going to walk you through 5 tangible steps to creating YOUR own definition of balance and craft a life that is BY DESIGN. Proactive instead of reactive.
Let's dig in.
Love and light,
P.S. Don't forget to take a screenshot and share today's episode in your IG stories to get featured in my stories!
Full transcription available at the bottom of this blog post.
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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION:
Hey girl. Hey, welcome to episode 59. We're going to be talking about the balance. I can't even count for you. The number of times people have told me recently that balance is a lie. And every time they say it, it makes me cringe and it also kind of bugs. Cause I'm like, yo girl, like you actually have more power than, you know, you can actually live a life by design and you can have it all because boss lady I'm on a school. You are how to craft a beautifully balanced life and balance what that might mean to you, you and the categories that might be fulfilling in your heart. And we're just going to learn today how to create this in your life, no matter where you are. Hey, even if you have a full-time job, even if you are so overwhelmed, no way that you think you could ever live a more balanced, peaceful life, I want to prove you wrong.
So that's why you're here today. And I can't wait to dig into today's show, but first let me read you the review of the week. This is a five-star review left by JB, O N I K O w. I don't know how to pronounce that. JB Ana, no, regardless. I had to read this. It's titled sobbing by the way. Are you kidding me? Is this real life? I literally sobbed through my first podcast as the words spoken, which straight to my heart network, marketing moms, boys. Hustlers doubt grit. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Oh my gosh. Thank you. That review was gold and Hey boss, you've been hearing me talk all about podcasting and what it has done for my business, right? I mean, podcasting legit exploding with audio consumption on the rise growing over 30% every single year. I believe that creating a platform where you can spread your word and speak your heart show up without having to get fancy for YouTube or hustling and grind on Instagram and Facebook and try to battle the algorithms.
I believe I truly in my heart believe that audio is the next wave. And I think sister friend, that if you secure your spot with a podcast of your, Oh, and to grow your brand, your mission and your bank account, and you pair it with passive income products, you are going to be a massive success story. I believe it's so much that I created a course all about podcasting called podcast pro university. If you want to take a quiz and see if podcasting might be right for you and you want to hop on my 100% free webinar, 10 steps to starting a podcast, how you can monetize a podcast, how it works and what the heck you could even talk about. I got you boo. Head over to podcast pro university.com. Take the quiz, hop on the podcastprouniversity.com
Meet you there. What's up mama boss. Welcome back to The Mompreneur Mastermind Show. I'm Stefanie Gass, success strategist and passive income queen creator. If you're ready to step into your God, led potential, create profit from your passions and capture the success that is already yours. This podcast was made for you as always. And you can find out more and connect with me over at stefaniegass.com. So grab that cup of coffee or fill up that glass of wine. And let's dig in to today's show.
Excited about today's episode because I've had a couple of people tell me, you know, Stephanie listen balance. Isn't real. It's a lie. There's no way we can be balanced. And I think maybe that idea is coming from a place where we don't understand what balance means. When people think of balance, they're thinking of like a scale, you know, and you've got one side of the scale is here in the middle and the other side is over here and it has to be equal. And so to these people that are telling me that they don't believe in balance. I think they think every area of life has to be 50, 50, 25% kids, 25% fitness, 25% spirituality, 25% business. And if it's not feeding into all of those perfect buckets, balance doesn't exist. But I want you to redefine the way that you think about balance.
In this episode, let's think of balance as a blend. And one of the girls in my community said this to me. She was like, Hey staff, don't you think it's more of like a blend? And I just am obsessed with that. So I want to use that as our visualization today. So instead of saying, I can't live a balanced life, unless everything is exactly equal. I want you to think about a blend. How can you create this perfect blend of all of the areas that are super important to you and that make you the happiest you and the healthiest you and the most successful you. Okay. Because I think not believing in balance is simply a lie that people tell themselves so that they can make excuses for why they are lacking in one area or another. Truly because life doesn't always come easy. Am I right?
There are certain categories or certain pieces of your life that are harder than others. And that's because each of us are gifted with zones of genius, with things that we're gifted at and then things that were not gifted at, you know, I don't every day wake up and say, okay, today I feel like a salad. Like I'm so gifted at healthy eating. I feel like running a marathon like fitness for me has to be a habit because it's not something that I naturally wake up and I'm excited about and that's okay, but it still has to be put into my blend or my balanced life. I feel so strongly about this because as women, we have the power to define our lives. You sister, right there, you, you have more power than, you know, but for some reason, along the way, it got twisted. You were a little girl and you had these dreams in your heart and you had these aspirations and then maybe you went to school and you, you know, learned that, Oh, I have to get an education.
I have to get a certain job. Maybe your parents pushed you towards something and you kind of lost that fire. Well then maybe you've gotten a serious relationship. Maybe you even got married. Maybe you have a couple littles. And now that amazing woman that had dreams and excitement and this fire in her belly to head out into the world and do something incredible is kind of living for everyone else. Are you stuck under 16 loads of laundry or is that just me? Are you frustrated as you stare at that sink full of dishes? That just no matter how often you wash them, it magically refills or is that just me? Are you stuck running the carpool and picking up your kids? Right? When you put one kid down, you got to get the other kid from school. I mean, girlfriend, I feel you it's hard, but it is not impossible.
Okay? It is not impossible. Again, we, as women, as mothers, as female entrepreneurs, as all the things to everyone, we still have the power to define our lives. And we have the power to create the power blend of things that we want to fill our day with. So that's what I want you to first get. And here's the thing. Kay? So let's reframe our mindset and then I'm going to teach you how to design a balanced life came. We get to, instead of looking at life like, Oh, I'm just doing all these things for everyone else. I can never get ahead. I don't provide financially. So therefore I'm not worthy of blank or I have the full-time job. So I'm lacking as a mother guys, like all of these things are just total lies that you're filling your subconscious mind with. I believe like stuffing out the dreams that you could have.
And instead of doing that, I want you to reframe this. I want you to think about what we get to do as women and mothers and female entrepreneurs. We get to wake up every, with a clean page in our planner, right? We get to choose what to fill those open spaces with. We get to choose, choose how we spend our own discretionary income. And maybe that's not much, but it's still yours. And you still get to choose where to put that money. We get to decide what we really want. No one else is allowed to choose that for you. No one else can tell you what you want. It's only you, you are the only one that knows your most balanced life. You are the only one that can define the categories that are going to fuel you, you and lift you up to your fullest, potential your highest vibration.
If you are living at your highest, most balanced, fueled self, you're going to operate so much better. You're like a well-oiled machine that's maintained, you know, and they're like popping on the new parts. They're shine in us. You know, you're running your rock and your role in your efficiency and your output is going to be tenfold, that old car, Steve machine in the corner that everyone's ignoring. They're kicking it because it doesn't work. It feels messy and dirty and underutilized and undervalued and underappreciated in that machine is getting the brunt of everything you get to decide. Okay? So you get to work towards the life of your dreams. You don't get to just step into the life of your dreams, but you get to work towards it. You get to learn how to love that journey, right? You get to feel the blessing of every setback and failure, because that's how you're going to learn to grow.
You get to set boundaries that matter to you and you get to choose what you fill your mind with who the friends are that you're surrounding yourself with, who are the personal development speakers that you're listening to every day when you're in the car, when you're in the shower, when you're doing laundry, because I hope you're listening to some, okay, look, life is messy. I have kids too. I have a spouse, too. We have jobs and bills, but you can live proactively. Instead of reactively, I used to live reactively. You guys have heard this story from me. Now it's an intentional choice to spend every hour the way I want it, you spend that hour. Okay. And it's not a hundred percent, but it's a majority of my life. So if I can turn things around. So can you, do you want to live a life by design?
Do you want to figure out what your most balanced blend is and how you can create that for yourself so that you can live at an yes. Yes. Come on. Say it out sister. Yes. Show me the way. All right. Here's how I'm going to take you through five steps. Step number one, inventory, your life inventory, your life. You're like, what does that mean? Imagine you were doing like a food diary. Have you ever done that? Where you're trying to figure out why you're gaining weight or how you can get more fit. And they say, Hey, you know, jot down every single thing you put in your mouth for like 48 hours. And so you're doing this food journal and you're writing things down and I thought, okay, so I've done this exercise sidebar. And it's super funny because I'm like, Oh, I eat so healthy.
You know, I really well, I spread out my macros consistently between healthy fats and proteins and fibers and dah, dah, dah. And then you look at your food diary and guess what's in there. Oh, one of my kids, chicken nuggets, three French fries. Oh, one of those tiny Snickers bars. Ooh. I had a marshmallow too. Cause that was just like sitting there. And then when we went through McDonald's I meant to get a salad by accidentally, got an ice cream cone, these little decisions throughout your food diary experience, they impact your weight and your health and how your pants fit and how you feel about yourself. Right? So I want you to do the same thing for your life. Instead of making a food diary, you're going to make a list of how you spend your time. You're going to get out. Whether it's an Excel spreadsheet.
If you're a weirdo like me, or maybe just a simple piece of paper, and you're going to make a list of everything you do within your waking time for at least 48 hours. And I would just say, break this into probably hour increments. Okay. Or maybe 30 minute increments. If you really want to change the way you're spending your time. Okay. Be honest. It's easy to say, Oh, I worked from nine to nine 30 on social media, but were you working or were you scrolling where you actually replying to potential clients and following up with leads, were you doing discovery work for your newest launch? Were you posting something that is really going to resonate with your avatar? Or were you scrolling and wasting time? You can't change your life if you can't be honest about your life. Okay. So you have to look at your time and be able to look at yourself in the mirror after this exercise and say, Whoa, that's way too many nuggets case Def no more French fries, right?
Like it's the same concept, the little slip-ups they compound. So that's step one. I want you to do that right now tomorrow even, but make sure it's like a typical day. So if it's a Saturday and you're hanging out or a Sunday, I want you to start this all like on a Monday and Tuesday. So take your typical day where you don't have a trip or you don't have like a bunch of weekend plans happening to really inventory your time. Now, after you've done that step two, you're going to star a little gold star, the, a activities and the non-negotiables. This is all the important stuff, right? It's working. Like if you have a full-time job, you have to work. You don't have an option. So you have to put a star that that's not going to go anywhere. If you have 30 minutes that you spend meditating, that's a non-negotiable.
If you have an hour that you go to the gym, that's a non-negotiable if you sleeping, obviously it's a, non-negotiable the important stuff. Maybe every Wednesday, you have two hours that you go with your kids to the park. It's a tradition. It's a ritual nonnegotiable sister, like start, okay, prayer time working out. Maybe it's dinner time with your family. And you guys love to spend one hour each night, cooking dinner together, sitting at the table like this stuff. That's the gold, in my opinion. So star all of those things that's step two. So, and you can use a little gold star or you can use like a pink highlighter for this one. Just make sure they're really obvious those activities that you want to keep. And you have to keep step three. You're now going to take the other color highlighter, and you're going to highlight all the crap.
Okay? The poopy scoopy that's in your day, these are all the things that you can get rid of. That's the extra chicken nuggets. Okay? It's the scrolling social media. I'm telling you that has got to stop the watching mindless TV. When I'm doing me some laundry, I might throw on a cup like some work and girl or some whatever show I'm into at the moment and watch an hour. That is okay. You have permission to do that. Okay? If you're doing it every day, stop, you're missing out on opportunity to maybe listen to personal development. Maybe you can multitask and do your sales calls while you do laundry. Like there are multiple opportunities for growth, but we can't do that. If we're wasting our most precious time, maybe you're just sitting there picking your teeth for 30 minutes. What should I do? I'm so overwhelmed.
I'm just going to sit here and think about what to do. I'm going to think about thinking about starting my business today. Am I talking to you? Okay. Do you hear me? Okay. So you're going to highlight that one in a different color. Maybe you're just talking drama on the phone. I used to have this friend back in the network, marketing days, we would sit on the phone for at least an hour a day. And we would just talk about nothing productive. Believe. Gosh, when I look back on that, I'm like, what on earth? Like, first of all, who was I surrounding myself with? Secondly, the conversations I was having were doing nothing for my growth game. They were pulling me back. They were creating more constraints in my subconscious mind, which made me believe in myself less, which kept me stuck and on and on and on.
So these things have to be highlighted. And what else are you doing? That's wasting time. Step four. So now you've got your list. You've categorized things into activities and non-negotiables, and then the second one is the crap and the poop and the duty that you got to get rid of the wasting time. Step four, decide because now you have a map of your life. You're looking at it on paper. Here's what I'm doing. And guaranteed. I don't care how productive you are. I bet you have at least one hour on that piece of paper that is wasted time space, that you did something that was nonproductive that you could scratch. And I bet some of you have half the day. You're like, Oh my gosh, I didn't even notice that I was doing all those things or those little slots of 10 minute blocks where I'm pacing the house or watching YouTube video.
Like guys, you got to get rid of that. So step four is, decide, decide to claim balance. Now let me explain this to you because you're probably thinking balanced, Stephanie, I'm still not with you. I don't believe that I can have balance. Well, yes you can. And here's how I want you to define your three or four top categories in your life for me. And in this order, it is faith. It's my Christianity, it's family, my kids and my husband. Third is health. It's me living my healthiest life because I feel my absolute best. This is working out four to five times a week. This is sticking with my macros and what works best for me and just non-negotiable non-negotiable. And the final one is business. I was created with certain calls on my heart. God has pushed me and prepared me and taken me through seasons and journeys so that I can become an educator and empower women just like you.
And I have to claim that call and I don't make apologies for it. And I don't feel bad for it. So business is the fourth one, and I think that's incredible. So what are your three or four categories? And they don't have to be like mine. It can be anything in the world. I want you to write them down right now. What are the four areas that you know, would make the best? You maybe it's not, maybe today. You're not working out at all. Maybe you're sitting here listening to this while you're stuffing your face with a delicious green chili cheeseburger. Hmm, girl, listen up. You know, that has to shift though, right? So you got to pick the categories that are and create the best you think about. If you're looking out six months, what would those categories be? Kay. Don't judge yourself on what's lacking today.
Or maybe you're like, I'm a workaholic and I work 90% of my life. Okay. That's great. But is that really your best? You like, are you really being honest with yourself? If all you do is pour into this one category. I just don't know if that can make someone the happiest that they can be. So write down your four or three or four categories, put them in order final step, step five. You are now going to take action and plan this new balanced blend into your week. And this is what balance means to you. It's not 25%, 25%, 25%. Right? For me on a typical weekday, I would say it is 50%. Okay. And then I would say it's 10% health, 10% spirituality. And then 30% health probably. Okay. Something like that. But business is the biggest part for me, but that's what creates my most balanced life.
Right. Basically what I'm trying to say is you have to just make sure that you're touching on each category each week. And that might be like, I could even reassign that because on the weekends, it's basically 80% family. So it's okay with me to have 10% family on the weekdays. I mean, my kids are in school. We did the dinner thing together. We play for an hour like that is so adequate and amazing and makes everybody happy and fulfilled health that's happening on the weekdays. Not really the weekends. Okay. But business is happening every day. And so you have to create, what's my blend. How do I want it to look? And then you take the pen and write into the planner, how you want the day to flow. You have control of all your time scheduled events. You know, when you have to work, you know, when you have your client meetings, you know, when the gym classes are, or when you want to work out, when your kiddos eating breakfast or taking a nap, you know the stuff that's scheduled, that's time sensitive.
Write that in there first. Right? And then you get to decide how else to fill this space. So I decided, okay, I'm going to wake up 30 minutes earlier. I'm going to do my 30 minutes of spirituality, a prayer, my devotional, my journaling, every day I take two hours because one hour is working out. I've got to drive to the gym. I've got to drive home. Kay. That's just what it takes for me to have my most successful fitness experience. Okay. You then plan in power hours. When can you work on your dream? And even if it's a side hustle right now, when can you work on it? Is it an hour at night? Is it during the lunch break? Do you need to get to a coffee shop on a full day on Saturday? Where is the time find it? You have the power to craft the time openings and the spaces you need.
And even if you just need to communicate that to your spouse, to your friends, to maybe you need to hire a babysitter or outsource some certain things that you can create more space, do it. There's no way you're going to grow until you take control of your day. Okay. Now when you're working, you know, or when you're with your family or when you're focusing on spirituality, make sure it's dedicated time. So you're not working, but at the same time, you're trying to feed your kids dinner. Like I believe in multitasking, but it needs to be light activity like doing laundry and just listening to a podcast. If I'm here recording for you, like right now, this is like the highest energy output that I have for the entire week. It's recording podcasts. It's meeting with clients, it's private coaching. It's going into my groups and helping my students with their courses.
And during those high energy expenditure times, I'm not also praying. I'm not also trying to journal because it's going to just be horrible. Like neither one is going to be successful. And well-rounded so as you're creating your blend create blocks of time. And again, episode 12 time-blocking blocks of time for each category and just make sure maybe, and it's not going to be a perfect science. Some days are going to be heavy, focused on work. Some days might be heavily focused on your family. Some days might be heavily focused on whatever it means for you to be balanced. And that's okay. But I like to look at it from a high bird's eye view and say this week, did I touch on each category? And it's okay to say, Oh wow. Like my spirituality was lacking last week. I'm going to redefine that. And I'm going to recommit to it this week or my health.
I didn't make it to the gym one day. That's okay. We are human beings. However, you get back up and you go Monday, okay. You just keep focusing on your most balanced life, what it means to you and you recommit. You're allowed to fall off just as you are with anything else. But when you're balanced, most balanced life is just as important as eating healthy, as being successful in business as being an amazing mama, because you need to be the most fuel Jew. Okay? So just step on up to the plate when you fall off, that's the point there? So this is what my message was here. It's just simply to take back control of your time. You are not here to just serve everything and everyone you are here listening to the show because obviously you got a passion on your heart, right? There's some big dream in there.
I mean, you were lied to me on purpose. And so if you're here listening to me, I want you to know that you actually can have it all you actually can, but you have to have a positive attitude. Be willing to work hard enough long enough, trust him. Okay. You've got to get the right people surrounding you. You've got to invest in yourself and stop making excuses as to why you can't outsource, or you can't invest in something that's going to grow. You. All of those things will lead you to your ultimate destination and pair that with living balanced and choosing how to spend those open blocks of time and making sure that you're focused on your most important categories. You're going to be on fire girlfriend. Like nobody's going to touch you with a 10 foot pole. They're like, Ooh, that girl smoke. And she's so hot, right? So that's my message.
I just want to leave you with a prayer that you find enough courage today to inventory your life. I pray that you,
You can be honest with your heart and challenge yourself to change the, you need to change
So that you can step into your own greatest potential. The privet God leads you to the people you need to inspire. You motivate you, wrap you up in love and courage and patients today. And I pray that you just have the most beautiful rest of your day as always love and light.
Lots of fancy unused education. Podcast Coach, Clarity Coach, & Top #25 Ranked Podcast Host for Christian Entrepreneurs.